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At conferences and work parties when I was single, I approached men who appeared to be alone. While planning her daughter's wedding, my divorced friend, Jane, developed a crush on the florist. From the time he walked in, he waxed poetic about his deceased wife. I couldn't be sure, but it was clear he was neither available nor ready. The subject matter should excite you — don't sign up for a bridge class if you hate playing cards — but the type of class has to be right, as well.
I went out with an instructor I talked to over the crabmeat canapés at a faculty event. Afterward, eager to keep the connection alive, she went to his shop and thanked him in person. Years earlier, newly divorced and pushing my daughter on a playground swing, I spotted a cool-looking man with his daughters. At a Web-design course, for example, my divorced neighbor, Larry, faced a computer and a blank wall — no interaction with fellow students, no chance to mingle.
My friend Leslie met her future husband, Paul, when they sat next to each other on a plane to San Francisco. On a bench inside Philadelphia's Penn Station, waiting for his train to Washington, an acquaintance named Bob started talking with the woman beside him.
A fellow theater buff, he learned, she was headed for New York.
If you're in one of those groups, you're probably hoping to find your special someone — and wondering, Where can he or she be?
But take heart if online dating sites put you off, for many ordinary places make excellent potential meeting grounds.
With the use of modern technology, people can date via telephone or computer or meet in person.
Dating may also involve two or more people who have already decided that they share romantic or sexual feelings toward each other.
Others, actively dating, long to expand their pool of possible partners.
Actually, it was his train, but he had the presence of mind to get her number.
One phone call, 25 years and five children later, they are married and still talking — and traveling — together.
And if romance does bloom, it may be hard to do your jobs when you're preoccupied with arranging "alone time." But relationships can take root and thrive in this fertile meeting ground.
My copywriter friend, Suzanne, started dating a fellow team member, Joe, at her advertising agency.
You may have to stretch your normal behavior — that is, you may have to reach out, assert yourself, be creative, act strategically and think outside the box.